Dear Momofuku,

Dear Momofuku,

I am a vegetarian. Since birth. I am not uppity or all “don’t be cruel to animals” about it. My parents were just hippies, that’s all. I did not threaten to sue you/sue you/even consider suing you. I wait in line like the rest of the hungry minions. So why do you hate me? Please give me some noodle soup, darn it. And maybe a veggie steamed bun option? Thanks!

Love,

Me

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